Sleeping Awake

I keep avoiding this subject. Its not out of fear or because I dont have anything to say about it though… its simply because the subject seems to become more complex with each passing day.

Its so hard to keep from breaking. Everyone is lurching with the boat. From left to right. Hard left then sharp right. My chest feels so tight. Its a roller-coaster ride with no one at the controls & we seem to only be able to brace ourselves for the impact. Except… the impact already came. We went through the banister & landed in a pit of scorpions.

Each day I read the news, anticipating either to hear that martial law has been declared or that the apocalypse is upon us. Each day seems to be a step towards this. Each day the feeling of powerlessness becomes stronger. And though I fight it… its becoming a struggle.

The world is not what it was. My world is not what it was. Once upon a time there was hope & optimism. Movies where about good guys beating bad guys & people used to love each other. But now people boo the good guy, cheer the bad guy, hate each other, would rather steal than heal & kids aspire to be villains. Its quite chilling.

The craziest part of all is that all of this is merely a few symptoms of a larger malaise that is plaguing our world. I think about this… and then I realize I have work in the morning & put it in the back of my mind.

Yes, its hard to keep from breaking. But its harder to break free from what is keeping us subdued.

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